Page 110 - Issue4-November2017_online_opt
P. 110
the shidduch project
me if you get stuck.” tions. “They helped you, didn’t they?” Gold,” Molly said in Hebrew. She spoke
During the height of the summer, it slowly, tentatively tripping over her
uuu words.
felt especially good to be out and walking
It was nearly midnight when Molly, at dawn, when the air was still fresh and “English is okay. You must have
alone in the delicious coolness of her gar- slightly cool. davened well. What a zechus.” Mrs. Ko-
den, finally read Shulamis’s list of shid- polovich spoke with a heavy Brooklyn
duch questions. It began with the single “Thanks for sending them, but I can’t accent.
word smoke followed by a question mark. do this. I’ll pay you.” With a large brood
and a husband in kollel, Shulamis was “Tell me about her. What’s she like?”
Smoke? Chareidi women didn’t forever strapped for cash. Maybe she’d In English Molly’s voice was louder and
smoke, did they? take this on as a job. more confident.
Then she remembered. The last child “I’d do it for free if it would help, but “Let me tell you a story. She’s going
Shulamis had married off was her daugh- you need to be listening closely to hear for accounting, right? When the girls had
ter Devori, so she’d been researching the nuances. No outsourcing, dearie.” a big test, she baked cookies that looked
boys, not girls. like ledgers, just to put everyone in a
“But I can’t. I really can’t.” good mood. That’s the kind of girl she is.
Molly drew a line through the word. In “Didn’t you once tell me that you act- She goes to a shiur and visits a sick baby
the unlikely event that Ayelet indulged in ed in university?” in the hospital, nebach, to give the par-
cigarettes, she probably kept it a closely “That was in another lifetime.” ents a break.”
guarded secret. “Pretend you’re on stage saying your
lines.” “Wow. Very impressive.” Molly’s heart
The next questions were basic: age, “Oh, come on.” fluttered. What a wonderful girl Esther
height, build, which was a polite way of “You can do it, girl. I know you can. had found for her son.
asking for the girl’s weight. These were We can role-play.”
followed by questions about character. “I’ve got to go now, but if you need
Is he/she easygoing/bossy/demanding? uuu anything, please call,” said Mrs. Ko-
This sounded like what Nachum would polovich.
call a leading question, a question a law- Later that morning, Molly pulled the
yer used that was designed to elicit a par- reference list and questionnaire from Molly hung up the phone, certain
ticular result. Molly crossed this out and the drawer. Why did all the references there was nothing more to ask.
wrote: “Describe her temperament.” have unpronounceable names like Ko-
polovich, Genechovsky, and Hasonovich? Many boys married their first girl. Her
Then came questions about the family: nephews in New Jersey both had. They
the siblings, their ages, their lives. Would She made an iced coffee and reached were fine yeshiva boys, and their wives
Ayelet’s parent ask the same questions into the freezer for a leftover piece of last were wonderful young women. Perhaps
about her own family? At 13, her young- Shabbos’s chocolate mousse cake. Most Asher would luck out too.
est son Moshe was in eighth grade and of the time, she avoided sweets, but this
adjusting well to post-bar mitzvah life, was an exception. Just then, Bella walked into the kitch-
but Bella and Elazar? It seemed like their en, her pale blue uniform blouse un-
lives ran from crisis to crisis. This week’s Fortified by caffeine and calories, she tucked, her dark blonde hair spilling over
was over Elazar’s long hair, which hit the grabbed the phone and dialed the only her shoulders, and her fingernails cov-
edge of his collar. The yeshiva didn’t like name on the list she could pronounce, ered with chips of red nail polish like tiny
it. Molly would solve the problem the way Chaya Weiss. The line was busy. Was that mosaics. Why was she home now?
she usually did – with a bribe. She’d pay a sign? She dropped her head on the ta-
Elazar to take a haircut, but nobody else ble and closed her eyes. Maybe she’d give “Hi, Ima.” Bella smiled sweetly, the
needed to know that, or did they? this job to Nachum? He was a great talk- silver from her braces glittering in the
er, but he was away a lot and, although morning sun.
At the bottom of the page came an- they’d been in Israel for more than 20
other question that left a sick feeling in years, he’d never learned Hebrew. “Do you need the nail polish remover?”
her stomach: Expecting money? Ugh. “No.”
She let out a loud yawn and got up from She lifted her head and pressed her “Really?” The school usually picked
her lawn chair. It was late, time to sleep. thumb and forefinger against her nose up on these infractions more quickly
She folded the sheet into quarters and and performed a few alternate nostril than Molly did.
slid it into a drawer at her kitchen desk breaths, the yogic tranquilizer. Then she “Really, I’m just here to get my alge-
next to the slip of paper containing the closed her eyes and chose a name. Rochel bra book.”
names and numbers of the references. Kopolovich. As the phone rang she tried “Then tuck in your shirt and fix your
She’d leave this for another day. out various pronunciations: KO-polovich hair and take off the polish.”
or Ko-PO-lo-vich or Kopolo-VICH. “Ima, I don’t have time.” Bella ran into
uuu her room, grabbed the book, and left.
On the fifth ring, Mrs. Kopolovich an- Molly dropped her head on the desk.
On their morning walk Shulamis swered. Bella wasn’t stupid. She knew the rules,
asked Molly about her reference ques- hair in a ponytail, shirt tucked, no nail
“I’m calling to find out about Ayelet
102 u www.wherewhatwhen.com u
me if you get stuck.” tions. “They helped you, didn’t they?” Gold,” Molly said in Hebrew. She spoke
During the height of the summer, it slowly, tentatively tripping over her
uuu words.
felt especially good to be out and walking
It was nearly midnight when Molly, at dawn, when the air was still fresh and “English is okay. You must have
alone in the delicious coolness of her gar- slightly cool. davened well. What a zechus.” Mrs. Ko-
den, finally read Shulamis’s list of shid- polovich spoke with a heavy Brooklyn
duch questions. It began with the single “Thanks for sending them, but I can’t accent.
word smoke followed by a question mark. do this. I’ll pay you.” With a large brood
and a husband in kollel, Shulamis was “Tell me about her. What’s she like?”
Smoke? Chareidi women didn’t forever strapped for cash. Maybe she’d In English Molly’s voice was louder and
smoke, did they? take this on as a job. more confident.
Then she remembered. The last child “I’d do it for free if it would help, but “Let me tell you a story. She’s going
Shulamis had married off was her daugh- you need to be listening closely to hear for accounting, right? When the girls had
ter Devori, so she’d been researching the nuances. No outsourcing, dearie.” a big test, she baked cookies that looked
boys, not girls. like ledgers, just to put everyone in a
“But I can’t. I really can’t.” good mood. That’s the kind of girl she is.
Molly drew a line through the word. In “Didn’t you once tell me that you act- She goes to a shiur and visits a sick baby
the unlikely event that Ayelet indulged in ed in university?” in the hospital, nebach, to give the par-
cigarettes, she probably kept it a closely “That was in another lifetime.” ents a break.”
guarded secret. “Pretend you’re on stage saying your
lines.” “Wow. Very impressive.” Molly’s heart
The next questions were basic: age, “Oh, come on.” fluttered. What a wonderful girl Esther
height, build, which was a polite way of “You can do it, girl. I know you can. had found for her son.
asking for the girl’s weight. These were We can role-play.”
followed by questions about character. “I’ve got to go now, but if you need
Is he/she easygoing/bossy/demanding? uuu anything, please call,” said Mrs. Ko-
This sounded like what Nachum would polovich.
call a leading question, a question a law- Later that morning, Molly pulled the
yer used that was designed to elicit a par- reference list and questionnaire from Molly hung up the phone, certain
ticular result. Molly crossed this out and the drawer. Why did all the references there was nothing more to ask.
wrote: “Describe her temperament.” have unpronounceable names like Ko-
polovich, Genechovsky, and Hasonovich? Many boys married their first girl. Her
Then came questions about the family: nephews in New Jersey both had. They
the siblings, their ages, their lives. Would She made an iced coffee and reached were fine yeshiva boys, and their wives
Ayelet’s parent ask the same questions into the freezer for a leftover piece of last were wonderful young women. Perhaps
about her own family? At 13, her young- Shabbos’s chocolate mousse cake. Most Asher would luck out too.
est son Moshe was in eighth grade and of the time, she avoided sweets, but this
adjusting well to post-bar mitzvah life, was an exception. Just then, Bella walked into the kitch-
but Bella and Elazar? It seemed like their en, her pale blue uniform blouse un-
lives ran from crisis to crisis. This week’s Fortified by caffeine and calories, she tucked, her dark blonde hair spilling over
was over Elazar’s long hair, which hit the grabbed the phone and dialed the only her shoulders, and her fingernails cov-
edge of his collar. The yeshiva didn’t like name on the list she could pronounce, ered with chips of red nail polish like tiny
it. Molly would solve the problem the way Chaya Weiss. The line was busy. Was that mosaics. Why was she home now?
she usually did – with a bribe. She’d pay a sign? She dropped her head on the ta-
Elazar to take a haircut, but nobody else ble and closed her eyes. Maybe she’d give “Hi, Ima.” Bella smiled sweetly, the
needed to know that, or did they? this job to Nachum? He was a great talk- silver from her braces glittering in the
er, but he was away a lot and, although morning sun.
At the bottom of the page came an- they’d been in Israel for more than 20
other question that left a sick feeling in years, he’d never learned Hebrew. “Do you need the nail polish remover?”
her stomach: Expecting money? Ugh. “No.”
She let out a loud yawn and got up from She lifted her head and pressed her “Really?” The school usually picked
her lawn chair. It was late, time to sleep. thumb and forefinger against her nose up on these infractions more quickly
She folded the sheet into quarters and and performed a few alternate nostril than Molly did.
slid it into a drawer at her kitchen desk breaths, the yogic tranquilizer. Then she “Really, I’m just here to get my alge-
next to the slip of paper containing the closed her eyes and chose a name. Rochel bra book.”
names and numbers of the references. Kopolovich. As the phone rang she tried “Then tuck in your shirt and fix your
She’d leave this for another day. out various pronunciations: KO-polovich hair and take off the polish.”
or Ko-PO-lo-vich or Kopolo-VICH. “Ima, I don’t have time.” Bella ran into
uuu her room, grabbed the book, and left.
On the fifth ring, Mrs. Kopolovich an- Molly dropped her head on the desk.
On their morning walk Shulamis swered. Bella wasn’t stupid. She knew the rules,
asked Molly about her reference ques- hair in a ponytail, shirt tucked, no nail
“I’m calling to find out about Ayelet
102 u www.wherewhatwhen.com u
