So what happens when you have 45 people – including a Bubby (me) and Zeidy, 24 children under the age of 12, four teenagers, and seven young married couples – who want to spend time together, feel that they “did something” this summer, and create a feeling of solidarity among family members. And you are on a tight budget!?
We pondered and chewed on this question on and off over the year. One of the solutions we came up with was that we would win the lottery, and then we’d rent a beautiful place in the North of Israel, with cute little cabins (one for each family) and a private swimming pool – maybe even with a stable of fun horses. Another creative solution involved staying home and dreaming about the first solution. But we already tried that one year and didn’t find it so satisfying, so this year we thought we would do something new.
The solution we came up with worked out so well that I thought I would write up our experiences in the hope that other families might benefit from some of these ideas. Even though each family’s dynamic is different, and we all have different resources to draw on, different energy and interest levels, and live in different settings, I think there are still some principles we incorporated into this three-day vacation that might stimulate ideas that would replicate the feeling of satisfaction and fun in many other incarnations.
Practical Aspects that Made this Work
Our particular family constellation this year was particularly conducive to this kind of vacation. Our oldest grandchild is 12, and our focal point became the middle group of nine 6- to 12-year-olds. Children younger than six are satisfied with a trip to the local playground or playing with play dough at the kitchen table, but the 7 to 12 age group, even though they are still innocent enough to enjoy the small things of life, still need to feel like they did something worthy of the name vacation. Parents of this age group are usually also happy when their kids are happy and entertained – even if the activities do not match their intellectual level!
This kind of plan would definitely need to be tweaked if there were more teenagers in the group, but our own four teenagers stepped into the proprietary role that their status as aunts and uncles bestows upon them, and became equal partners in creating this vacation (after we made it clear that there would be other, more age-appropriate activities for them at other times during the summer).
In Eretz Yisrael, people often rent a vacation cottage (called a tzimmer) in the North, but accommodations for a group this size was way over our budget. Instead, we rented a few apartments in a pretty suburb of Jerusalem, where a few of our married children already live, from families who had traveled to the States for the summer. Luckily, we were able to find one very big apartment with a huge living room/kitchen area and an expansive porch, which became our main “campus.” The apartment, while clean and pleasant, was also pretty bare – which was great for us since there was almost nothing to break. But there was also plenty of toys for the children to play with. Others of our married children rented some small apartments around the area, and one couple even managed to arrange a switch – where the family whose apartment they stayed in stayed in their apartment in a different city, at no cost to either of them.
Goals for the Three-Day Camp
One of our primary goals with this vacation was to create a feeling of solidarity. We wanted the children to walk away feeling part of something bigger than themselves, something that has a name and an atmosphere and a value. We felt that this would create momentum for future events, and would generate loyalty and interest. To that end, we had a graphic artist create a logo out of the name we gave the camp, and we included one of Zeidy’s favorite lines under the logo as a motto, which quickly became an inside joke. We had the logo printed on sticky paper, which we stuck on all kinds of things that we used in the camp. We also had matching caps printed with the logo, which we presented the first day of the camp in the “welcome package” that each family received.
Included in the welcome package was a water gun for each child (to be used later that evening in a fierce water fight at the park) and a cute wrapped gift for the mother and the father. We included a printed program sporting our logo and some candy. Just opening the welcome packages was exciting and set the tone for the next few days.
A nice touch that added to the camaraderie was a five-page newsletter one of the grandchildren produced, with jokes, hand-drawn comics, a few stories written by other grandchildren, date-appropriate happy birthday and anniversary wishes, and some science facts.
Besides the “branding,” which we hoped would give everyone the feeling that they were part of something bigger than themselves, we had a few other goals. Too often, vacations turn children into consumers, where they sit around waiting to be entertained and becoming the judges about whether what was offered was “fun enough.” We wanted to create a different dynamic, where the children would be active participants: responsible and in charge of making things work. We also wanted to put them in the position of giving to their parents and the other members of the family, instead of the usual situation where the parents cater to the children.
Another one of our criteria was not to indulge in artificial fun but to create the fun with our own hands and through all of us being totally present. The simple activities we chose were definitely easy on our budget, but that was not the only reason we chose them. For example, there happens to be a small amusement park nearby, but we specifically chose not to go there; instead, we spent an equivalent amount on transportation to get to a hiking-through-low-water trail further away that we could do as a family, enjoying nature.
Tuesday Afternoon, Erev Camp: Day One,
The most daunting pre-camp job was figuring out the menu and making a shopping list. Our goal was to create fun, cooperative food adventures that would keep the children happy and engaged and the adults happy and well fed. Once the list was made, the first activity, “shopping with Zeidy,” became part of the adventure. The entire target group (children aged 7 to 12) went along with Zeidy, and scurried around the supermarket with the shopping list, filling a few wagons with everything we would need. The same children, who usually kvetch and complain at having to carry up the shopping, suddenly metamorphosed into willing and excited workers making multiple trips up and down the stairs to shlep all the packages and organizing the stuff in the kitchen with enthusiasm.
After receiving their welcome packages, the nine children who fell into our main target group were nominated “kitchen staff” and received a huge plastic apron (cost 50 cents) adorned with our logo. They were promptly dispatched to the kitchen for the second activity of the evening.
The Ice Cream Bar
Kicking off our event with something delicious and exciting was a good move. We turned the table widthwise in the living room creating a type of bar, and the children spread out a few boxes of ice cream as well as lots of fun toppings, including nuts, chocolate sprinkles, colored sprinkles, cherries, and different types of syrups, cones, and cups. Each person drew the name of another person out of a box and was then personally responsible to find out what kind of ice cream his designated partner wanted. He was then to procure that exact combination from the ice-cream man (aka Zeidy). It was fun to watch how various rival siblings ended up catering to the needs of their least favorite brother or sister.
After going back for limitless seconds and thirds until the ice-cream disappeared, the assembled “VIPs” trooped out to a local park, where their water guns were put to good use.
The second half of the evening involved gathering stones for our project the next morning. Bubby was the stone evaluator. Smooth, interesting shapes were in; bumpy, unwieldly, and boring were out. Suddenly, every patch of grass and bush became interesting since it might house an interesting stone. For over an hour the kids were busy stone searching while the adults sat around shmoozing and eating the sandwiches the “kitchen staff” had prepared.
The last event before we retired for the night. (Blessedly, the program said: 11 p.m., Layla Tov), was a skit put on by the children. Most adults break out in an allergic reaction at the thought of having to sit and listen to a long and unbearably boring child-made skit. I found a cute website offering one-page scripts perfect for kids because they were perfect for adults’ short attention spans. The two oldest grandchildren got copies of the skit, and it was their job to direct the acting troupes. The first skit they did was excellent because it was short, easy to teach the other children, and gave as many actors as needed a speaking part, so they could all participate. It even produced pretty genuine laughter from the adults. They did the same skit three times with three different endings and got a laugh each time. [See sidebar]
Wednesday: Day Two
Our hands-down best activity was on Wednesday morning when we painted the rocks. There are numerous clips available online on how to paint rocks. We bought about 10 colors of gouache paint (similar to acrylic paint) and put each color out on small plates around the table so everyone had access to all the colors. We had tons of paintbrushes in various sizes. I also passed around pictures on my phone with ideas of how to paint stones. The lady bugs, which involve a basic red with black spots, went over well with the middle kids. Another favorite was painting the top half yellow and the bottom half white and then adding a black zigzag line in between and some eyes at the top so that it looked like a chick hatching from an egg. Even the adults got into the rock painting in a major way – writing slogans, smiley faces, and family names, and experimenting with different effects, like thin lines of white against a dark background, etc. It was really interesting to see how much fun everyone had. Even one of the two-year-olds sat for at least half an hour slopping layer after layer of paint over his big rock until it was a beautiful mud color. We then put all the rocks on the window sill to dry. When they were dry, the older kids and adults took them out again to decorate further with Sharpies.
We also brought along sticker crafts for the younger set, and made half-hour rotations among the adults, so that whenever we needed the little ones out of the way (like when they got bored with the rocks, or when we were setting up meals), the adult on duty took them to the porch and did sticker projects with them. They had a great time there also enjoying the toys in the house, including dolls and strollers, riding cars, and building toys as well as a small wading pool. So the four-and-under crowd was busy as well.
As the project wound down, the kitchen staff was pressed into action again to create a “Baguettino” – a take-off of a local fast food place. Plates with tuna salad, egg salad, sliced onion, tomato, pickles, different colored olives, yellow cheese, and various other toppings were presented at the bar, we set up a few sandwich makers and everyone could produce their own baguette.
Then it was time to gather the troops for the exodus to a big beautiful park in another city. We had rented a small car, so all the food as well as the main barbeque guy and his helpers left on the first shift, while everyone else took the bus. For the next hour or so, the car shuttled the mothers and babies from the bus stop and the park, a 10-minute walk from the park.
Adon Ha’Barbeque, age 18, set up shop in a corner of the picnic area, while the rest of the crew spread themselves out on the grassy areas.
One major objective at the park was to get a good picture of all the grandchildren with their camp logo caps on. Anyone who has ever tried to organize a group photo knows that it takes forever. Some of the kids were riding their bikes, others were on the playground equipment and others were halfway across the park helping with the barbeque. Just getting them all assembled, deciding where to take the picture, and positioning them took us about 45 minutes.
One uncle was in charge of the marshmallow roasting station, and the kids got busy making a fire from scratch: setting stones in a circle and filling the center with dry grass, then roasting marshmallows with chocolate chips inside. Anything held over a fire with a stick has immediate appeal, apparently.
Another fun activity was the scavenger hunt. Each child got a bag with our logo sticker and a list of things they had to find. [See sidebar] The first one to find all the items got a prize, but there was a second level prize for anyone else who found everything on the list as well. In the middle of the scavenger hunt, one of the little kids wandered off, and he quickly became the most important item on the find-it list. Baruch Hashem, we found him a few minutes later, but on the advice of a seven-year-old grandson, we canceled the big prize so as not to penalize those who had stopped their scavenging to find their cousin.
Next was the hammock game. It is amazing how much fun 20 people can have with one sheet! Required are an enthusiastic, cooperative Zeidy and lots of imagination. The long grassy slopes in the park were the perfect setting for the hammock game. Each child gets a chance to lie on the sheet, and everyone else picks up the sides, making the sheet into a hammock, and swings the child around a bit. The highlight of it all was when Zeidy himself got onto the sheet. With all the goodwill in the world, there was no way those little hands could pull him up in a hammock, but they grabbed the ends and enlisted all-the-king’s-horses–and-all-the-king’s-men to shlep him up the hill, which they found hysterically funny.
We wrapped up the evening with a delicious barbeque and a siyum, which turned it into a seudas mitzva and straggled home to bed, looking forward to tomorrow, which would be the last day of camp.
Thursday: Day Three
Thursday morning we rented a pool for three hours – the first slot for the boys and the second slot for the (sleeping late girls. It turned out to be a wonderful bonding experience. It was a small family-sized pool, not meant for real swimming, but the kids had a great time, with relay races, contests, and fooling around. There is something about water that is very invigorating and equalizing – where age and weight (!) really don’t matter. An hour-and-fifteen minutes was just the right amount of time to have fun and not feel like it was too much.
Everyone came out rejuvenated and relaxed, and we were on to our next activity, which was a falafel stand for lunch. The kitchen staff cut tomatoes and cucumbers into tiny pieces for an Israeli salad, put the chips in the oven, and baked the falafel balls, then acted as waiters to produce falafels according to request.
After lunch, we had a jewelry-making session run by one of the aunts. Each person got three different sizes of flat metal safety washer discs (they look like a small metal donut) that you buy at the hardware store and cost a few cents each. The biggest one was about the size of a penny. A plethora of sharpies in various colors was available, and the idea was to color the discs with some sort of pattern. Diaper wipes were used for washing off mistakes. When satisfied with the way their disc looked, they sealed it with clear nail polish and went on to the smaller disc. At the end, they placed the three discs one on top of each other and thread a black string through them knotting it around the disks and again at the two ends of the strings to make a necklace. Surprisingly, the necklaces really came out nice and could even be worn. The boys made them as a gift for their mothers or grandmothers, and the girls put them on right away.
After lunch, the plan was to do a hiking trail through a stream with the older kids, while the younger kids and their mothers gathered in a beautiful park at the end of the trail and set up the picnic of deli sandwiches.
We ended up transitioning to a sophisticated playground, which included an omega (a tire on a kind of zipline), which the older kids loved. For the next few hours, little groups of shmoozers formed on the benches situated every few feet, while the children played, excited by being out so late at night. Finally, at around 11 p.m., we packed up and trooped back to the apartments.
We had considered staying for Shabbos and pulling together a huge family Shabbos, but Bubby and Zeidy were pretty “camped-out,” and we decided to leave while the going was good. We got up early, cleaned the apartment, and were on our merry way by 9:30 a.m. We got home in time to put together a quiet Shabbos of recovery and good memories.
The writer is a former Baltimorean who currently lives in Israel.
Side Bar #1
The Skit
This skit requires four to eight campers, depending on how long you want the skit to last.
Camper #1: Walks onstage and squats down as if he is sitting on a bench that is invisible.
Camper #2: (Walks up to #1.) “Whatcha doin’?”
Camper #1: “Just sitting on this invisible bench.”
Camper #2: “Can I join you? “
Camper #1: “Sure.”
Camper #2: Sits down next to #1.
Camper #3: Repeats the dialog.
Each camper comes on and repeats, making a long line of campers sitting on the bench. Last camper walks up to line of campers.
Last Camper: “What are you guys doing?”
All Campers: “Just sitting here on this invisible bench.”
Last Camper: “No you aren’t. I moved the bench over there.” (Points)
All the sitting campers fall down.
Variations on the Ending
Variation #1:
Last Camper: “No you aren’t. I moved the bench over there yesterday.” (Points)
Camper #1: “But, I moved it back here this morning!”
Last Camper: “Oh, okay!” (Sits down with the rest)
Variation #2:
After the last Camper says, “Oh, okay!” and sits down with the rest, one more Camper enters: “What are you guys doing?”
All Campers: “Sitting on this invisible bench.”
One more Camper: “Oh no! I just got done painting that bench!”
All Campers: “AAAAGH!” (Stand up and wipe paint off back sides.)
Variation #3:
One more Camper: “Oh no! I just got done painting that bench!”
Camper #1: “Oh, that’s okay. We all have our invisible paint suits on.” (All stand up, and unzip front of invisible suits and step out.)
The source of the skit is icebreakerideas.com/skit-ideas/#The_Invisible_Bench.
Side bar 2
Scavenger Hunt
Each child must find the follow objects:
- a bumpy stone
- a stick the size of your hand
- a popsicle stick
- something yellow
- something pink
- a joke from one of your uncles
- two types of leaves
- two types of flowers
- something that makes noise
- 10 cents from Zeidy
- a tissue from one of your aunts that you get by telling her a nice memory you have of her
- a rule for life from one of the adults here
- 3 bottle caps
