It’s that time of year, when everyone in the school building walks around with an extra spring in their step knowing summer vacation is just around the corner. School years are wonderfully predictable, unlike much else in life. They have a beginning, followed by inevitable periods of conflict and drama, and finish with a predictable end – the last day of school. There is then a brief interlude followed by a sequel with the same format. If you have ever read a good novel, you know that, while all stories have a similar format, the best ones end with a closing that makes them memorable and stick with you for a while.
Children only experience each grade and age once; we want the story of their year to be just as memorable as any good book. More importantly, if we use this time of year correctly, our children and students will “own” what they have learned rather than it being something we have imposed on them. Parents and teachers can provide that satisfying closure that makes the lessons of this past year stick.
It is tempting to try to stuff in more learning in these waning weeks, or to give in to students’ desire to take it easy. But I would suggest that parents and teachers take the remaining days to guide the children on how to use this time of year wisely by reviewing, reflecting, discussing, and celebrating this past year.
Review
Chazal teach us that anyone who learns but does not review, it is as if he didn’t learn at all. At the end of the year, we should look back on our year’s learning and pick out the highlights we want to remember for the long term. For younger students, make a game of it and go on a “tour” of the year. In older grades, if we ask students to organize the lessons of a whole year by theme, it gives them a broader perspective that is more meaningful than memorizing random facts for a final. Reviewing the knowledge and skills that we want to be retained one last time makes it clear what is important and worth remembering.
Reflect
In addition to review, teachers and parents should encourage reflection. Reflection is asking questions of one’s self: How did I best learn? When did I help someone this year? What activities did I enjoy? Whom do I do my best work with? Whom do I best play with? What was my best work? What subject did I enjoy the most? Why? Both parents and teachers can find low-key opportunities to encourage their children to look back on the year thoughtfully.
Reflecting is an opportunity for every child to learn a little bit more about him or her self. That self-knowledge is key to building a life where a person is working toward his or her own potential. If children don’t learn to reflect on their accomplishments, they may leave school feeling like one in a crowd. They dress alike, they talk alike, they sometimes even walk alike. How will they know what they need to make their lives happy and productive that’s different than that of their neighbor? When they learn to think and reflect from a young age, they learn that they have a voice inside themselves that is worthwhile to listen to and can guide them in a positive way.
Discuss
Discussing, unlike reflecting, is a two-way street. It is a discussion between teacher and student or parent and child of what worked this year and what didn’t. This discussion can be especially awkward for teachers and students as they don’t have a lifetime of trust built up between them: I found that surveys or feedback forms as part of a test or final got much more honest and thoughtful answers than face-to-face conversations. Whether I taught elementary or high school, I have asked students for their thoughts on my teaching and curriculum in an age-appropriate way. Did they feel prepared for the tests? For the next steps? What would they leave out from the curriculum? What would they want more of? Why?
When students’ feedback is requested with maturity and gravitas, they respond thoughtfully. I never had a student who responded disrespectfully. In fact, being open about my desire for help has broken the ice with some of the most difficult students. And the suggestions are spot on. This year, over half my students gave the same suggestions on an end-of–the-year feedback without having talked to each other. I wouldn’t have thought of it on my own, but they are so right about what next year’s class needs. I may have my work cut out for me finding the resources they recommended, but at least I’m not going to waste time over the summer focusing on the areas that they think are fine. The students in a school are the biggest experts in the building on what good teaching looks like. They sit through enough classes to know good teaching when they see it. Tap that wisdom while you can.
Parents can have heart-to-heart conversations with their children about what worked well during the school year and what didn’t. Maybe you will find out that your previously effusive child does not want you saying goodbye at carpool anymore, or that she is struggling with essay writing, or that she wants help arranging more play dates. These conversations are not everyday gripe sessions but a discussion held after reflection where a parent can support a child in whatever he or she needs.
Celebrate
We know how to do celebration, or we think we do. Everyone brings in food and we have a party. Or we take the carpool for Slurpees on the last day of our drive. These fun activities are great, but we should add a meaningful part to the celebration which includes helping children recognize and be proud of their own growth. This may be a good time to pull out the portfolio of work that has been collected over the year so students have a picture of where they were at the beginning of the year and can see how much they have accomplished in a short time.
Every child has learned something this year. When I taught third grade, I had a student who could not learn shorashim (Hebrew roots); she failed every test. I divided up the shorashim the class needed to learn into levels. On level one shorashim, she learned 100% more than she knew at the beginning of the perek (chapter). She may have gotten a 45% objectively, but she still felt good and was willing to keep working hard at level one shorashim. The next test, she learned even more. Bit by bit, she grew.
Seeing growth and then celebrating it in a positive way is very powerful and an important life skill. Grades are by definition competitive: a comparison between me and someone else. If I get a 79 and someone else gets a 93, she is better than me and I feel worse about myself. It’s discouraging. If, however, I see that I learned five new things without regard for anyone else, I feel proud. Life is not about comparisons; it’s about growth. We can teach our children and students to focus on their deficits, what they don’t know or can’t do, which will be demoralizing. We can have them believe that they will be judged in comparison to others, which will make them jealous or haughty. Or, or we can teach them to look at their own accomplishments and be proud of themselves, which will help them grow and keep trying. At the end of the year, we should point out to our students and children how much they have grown in their middos, their academics, and their maturity as individuals and as a group.
A Word for Parents and Teachers
Not to scare you, but Rosh Chodesh Elul is only two-and-a-half months away. We know that there are things we want to do differently next year and things we regret from this past year. If we think about those things now, we can beat the teshuva rush and avoid having to figure out what to change when things are a lot fuzzier in our mind.
Review, reflection, discussion, and celebration are not just something that we should do with our children. We should also do this with ourselves. Now is the time to review what we learned; reflect on what went well, what didn’t, and what we want to change; have discussions with our partners in life planning for next year; and celebrate what we accomplished this year. By doing so, we will be setting ourselves up for success.
Have a relaxing start of summer!
Shira Hochheimer has been a Jewish educator of all ages from elementary to adults for close to 20 years. Before moving to Baltimore, she was a rebbetzin in Rochester, NY, and is the author of Eishes Chayil: Ancient Wisdom for Women of Today published by Mosaica Press.
