It’s not one of those urgent problems that insist on being solved immediately. And there’s not a lot of information to help us know what to do. And we’re not sure what criteria to use to make a decision. And we don’t even know what the ideal stance should be!
It’s children and books – or, more specifically, secular books. What can we, what should we, allow our children to read? It’s one of the predicaments of summer, when children have more time to read – although some children are insatiable all year round.
By now, the dilemma plagues a second generation of parents. We children of the Fifties and Sixties, when Jewish fiction was scarce, grew up on books from the public library. Those were the “good old days,” when children’s books were presumed to be innocent; mostly, they were. But by the Seventies and Eighties, something had changed on the way to the library. It became dangerous to let a child loose in the fiction section, where stories containing violence, foul language, “relationships,” or just plain chutzpa could be found.
“The Seventies saw the rise of the `problem novel’ for children,” says Mrs. Sarah Kuperman, a librarian who works in book acquisitions for Enoch Pratt library and at the Randallstown library’s information desk. “A lot of books from that time on were written about teens in trouble, no parents around, drug abuse, etc., with the idea that this is what kids were seeing their lives. It’s more challenging now to find books about normal people doing nice things.”
I experienced this change myself when my children were young and they wanted to read Judy Blume, a popular new author. Hearing that she was controversial, I read her book Blubber. It is the story of a girl who was cruelly rejected and bullied because she was overweight. That sounded like an important theme. I was glad to read that the bullied child actually became part of the “in” crowd the following school year. How shocked I was to find that, instead of using her experience to help other children in distress, she turned on the latest class victim and persecuted her. Is this real life in the school yard? Perhaps. But its treatment by the author struck me as devoid of any redeeming value. How does the child in this book transcend her pain or change as a result of it? This “realistic” ending ruined the book, in my opinion, evoking feelings of hopelessness and despair.
The Where What When has published reading lists in the past, always accompanied by the suggestion that parents read the book themselves and determine whether it is in accordance with their values and is right for their child. This is still the best advice, because no recommendation, no matter how expert, can account for individual perceptions of what is appropriate or not. (This is true even with regard to the Jewish fiction that has flourished in recent years.) Parenting in our time has come to include the responsibility of monitoring the books and other media that come into our homes and into our children’s minds.
The trouble is that most parents don’t have the time or patience to read all those children’s books. Simple lists help a little, but more is needed. In this article, we will discuss the issue in more depth and offer some tools.
A Good Book
When you read a book, you enter its world. In the case of Judy Blume, that world might be cynical and negative. But then there is the enchanting classic Charlotte’s Web, which is permeated by a spirit of kindness and empathy. Many fine, imaginative, and well-written secular books give children a glimpse into the huge and multifaceted world we live in. “A lot of books are not appropriate,” says Mrs. Barbara Mischel, a member of our community and manager of the Randallstown branch of the Baltimore County Public Library, “but there is a wealth of wonderful, heartwarming material out there for kids.” Mrs. Mischel describes a well-written book as “one that captivates the reader. It has a subject that the child is interested in, and a pace that is appropriate for the subject. Children have their likes and dislikes, just as adults do. Some of them like action and adventure, and some like a slower pace and more developed and complex characters.”
We might also agree that a good book teaches a child about himself and the world, has a worthy theme, and enhances the Jewish values he or she is learning from his home and school. But how do you distinguish the totally inappropriate from the truly inspiring? Mrs. Mischel suggests simply asking a librarian for recommendations. “Librarians are trained to advise library patrons. Your needs can be addressed. It’s just a matter of making your needs known and understood.”
There are other ways, as well.
A Tool for Parents
I came across an interesting attempt to solve the reading quandary on a Torah Umesorah website called www.chinuch.org. Created as a resource for day school teachers, the website overflows with teacher-created educational tools. Among them is the “Secular Book List,” a list of over 2,000 secular children’s books put together by Mrs. Alisa Avruch of Milwaukee and Mrs. Sharon Schwartz of Flushing, New York. They describe each book by title, author, and grade level, give it a rating according to criteria they developed, and often add comments about the book. (To find the Secular Book List, go to www.chinuch.org and type “secular book list” in the search box. You have to register on the site in order to download it.)
In their introduction to the list, Avruch and Schwartz explain that the ratings are entirely their personal opinions, and are not endorsed by any rav or yeshiva. They admit that they may have erred or that others may have different opinions. Their motivation, however, is sincere: “As concerned mothers,” they write, “we have noticed that the quality and content of the books available to our children leave much to be desired. As voracious readers ourselves, we know that the words a child (or adult!) reads can leave a permanent impression on his or her neshama. We also recognize that many children need the outlet that reading provides. We have therefore undertaken, be”H, to compile an ongoing list of books that we have checked, so that we can more easily provide our children with appropriate reading material.”
How They Judge a Book
Avruch and Schwartz evaluate the books’ contents in these areas: boy/girl relationships; religion and heresy; coarse or violent language; general violence; divorce, death, and broken families; middos; fantasy and magic; street reality, like drugs, abuse, and alcoholism; and references to TV, movies, and rock music.
The books are listed alphabetically by author and are given one of four ratings: “OK” means acceptable; “OK?” means generally acceptable but parents should decide based on the comments; “No” means unacceptable; and “No?” means that the book has significant problems but may be acceptable in certain situations, as determined by the parent.
The authors detail a book’s drawbacks in the comments column, and their views are nuanced. For instance, books that focus on boy/girl relationships are generally not acceptable. However, if the relationship results in marriage and only minor affection is described, these will be noted but the book is not rejected. Glorification of another religion or a proselytizing tone is unacceptable, but mention of Christian holidays or hashkafa issues like evolution is noted so that parents can discuss them with their child. Violence in battle scenes or between magical creatures is acceptable, but violence or bullying that is depicted as all right or exciting is not. On divorce and death, Schwartz and Avruch describe the content. They feel that such a book might be completely inappropriate for some children but may be therapeutic for children facing a similar situation. Avruch and Schwartz think that fantasy and magic is acceptable for children who can distinguish between fantasy and reality. However, they note such themes for those who disagree.
The authors of the Secular Book List are very specific on objectionable details of a book. Here is an example of the listing for The Chamber of Secrets, the second volume of the super-popular Harry Potter series. It is rated OK? with this comment:
Note for series: Only OK if child can distinguish between fantasy and reality and know real magic is assur. Is often read by children younger than intended grade level. Mentioned in passing – boy’s mom “fancies” an author, Boy’s father gets in a brawl with an evil man who insulted him (p 62). Halloween as a backdrop for a few chapters – no religion. Mention of sending valentines on Valentine’s Day. Younger girl has crush on boy – very juvenile. Bloody battle with evil snake. Page 341 (last page) girl catches brother kissing girlfriend – easy to cross out.
You will note that Avruch and Schwartz actually cite page numbers for the offensive material and suggest crossing out lines or tearing out pages. Parents should use their judgment. As Mrs. Kuperman says, “Crossing out lines just makes the child more curious. It’s better to just ask them not to read that book. Or, you can occasionally let them read a less-than-superior book and use it as a teachable moment. You just have to be honest with yourself about how much time you really have to discuss it.”
Here is the List’s comment about More All of a Kind Family, by Sydney Taylor, part of the popular All of a Kind Family series, which is rated “N?”
Historical Fiction. Family celebrates uncle’s wedding. Ella has first boyfriend. Family moves to the Bronx. Beautiful story but many issues: Boy/girl, children order bouquet delivered to mom in shul on Yom Kippur, swimming on mixed beach (illustration with old-time bathing suits), romantic hand-holding, mixed dancing, go to Conservative shul (father says it’s okay because it’s progressive).
Using these comments, a parent might decide to avoid the book. Or she might decide that the delightful story filled with positive family values outweighs the fact that the family is not totally frum. Or she might feel that their children will not notice the halachic details. Or she might want to discuss with them the historical setting in which the story takes place.
This kind of weighing of values is necessary for many books. As Mrs. Naomi Wolf, a teacher in a Miami Beach day school, says, “There were certain books I loved as a child. I evaluated them recently to decide if they were appropriate for my fourth grade classroom, I was surprised at some of the contents. Heidi spends time in church, and Mrs. Frisby and the Rats of NIMH includes a chapter about evolution. As a child, these went over my head, and I gained from the books. I did decide to stock them in my classroom, because, even if children do notice those things, I think that Christianity and evolution are not the nisyonos of our times; chutzpa is.”
Mrs. Avruch and Mrs. Schwartz have also written a separate list reviewing classics that are often read in middle and high schools, including Silas Marner, David Copperfield, Oliver Twist, Tuesdays with Morrie, Ann Frank, To Kill a Mockingbird, Julius Caesar, and The Merchant of Venice. An interesting aspect of the Classics List is their discussion of the Cliff Notes on all these works, which are often more explicit and thus more problematic than the classics themselves.
Beyond the List
The Secular Book List is most useful for books rated OK or No, whose content is either not problematic at all or very problematic. The OK? or No? ratings are more ambiguous. Avruch and Schwartz don’t – and don’t claim to – review books in a holistic way. While their comments attempt to explain the book’s issues, one is left wishing for more guidance in deciding whether a book’s merits outweigh its problems.
An excellent resource, recommended by Mrs. Kuperman, that might help can be found at www.commonsensemedia.org. Although it is not a Jewish resource, frum parents can benefit from the thoughtful information it presents. The mission of this not-for-profit organization, founded by parents, is the recognition that the media “profoundly impact the social, emotional, and physical development of our nation’s children.” The website therefore tries to provide “trustworthy information and tools, as well as an independent forum, so that families can have a choice and a voice about the media they consume.” (For those families who use other media, the website also reviews TV, movies, computer games, websites, and music.)
The website is very informative and well organized. If your child finds a book in the library, you can look it up by title or author. Or you can bring up lists of books by age level, awards won (e.g. the Newbery), genre (stories of family, friendship, adventure, mystery, historical fiction, etc.), and other categories.
Each book is rated for age appropriateness; message; violence; boy/girl relationships; language; consumerism; and drinking, drugs, and smoking. An example of a “message” would be, “Includes many lessons for `tweens’ on dealing with bullies, walking in someone else’s shoes, and the value of imagination and friendship.”
The site also gives each book a one- or two-paragraph review under the heading “What Parents Need to Know.” Below that is helpful feature, called “Families Can Talk About,” which lists discussion topics. Under Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, for instance, some questions are:
How did children’s flaws seal their fates? Did you change your opinion about Willy Wonka over the course of the book? Why was Charlie chosen to run the factory, even though he was not completely innocent? How would you behave in your favorite candy maker’s factory? Whom would you take with you as your special guest?
In addition to all this information, the website contains a section where comments submitted by parents and kids are posted. I found valuable remarks in this section that alert you to real children’s reactions to a book, including negative aspects that were not mentioned in the review.
What Can We Conclude?
It might seem that the assumption behind this article is that the library is a menacing place, with danger lurking within every sentence on its book-laden shelves. To those who ask, why take the risk at all? we could answer, why get on a plane or swim in the ocean? Why make a friend or start a business? All of these activities are “risky.” But, like books, they carry the potential for much excitement and joy. “Reading is mind expanding; it’s a healthy way to escape, to dream,” says Mrs. Mischel. “Reading makes us think; it’s how we learn, including learning from other people’s experiences and about other points of view. Reading is the key to success in many fields. It’s how we become more literate about the world around us – whether it’s limudei kodesh or a book about history, science, or knitting.”
So, what can we conclude? We can say that the guidance of Mrs. Avruch and Mrs. Schwartz is valuable; the advice of Commonsense Media is beneficial. But, in the end, parents must integrate the factual information they obtain from these tools with their own beliefs and goals for their family. It is the parents alone who must choose as wisely as they can, know that choosing matters, and then step back and let the magic happen.
