We made aliyah two-and-a-half years ago. As calendar coincidences work, Israel has been at war for exactly half of the time we have lived here. So, what have we learned in the past 15 and 30 months?
First, I should have paid much closer
attention to Mr. Pernikoff, z”l, at
the Talmudical Academy, and maybe I would not be having as much trouble with
conjugating verbs and keeping adjective genders aligned. For those under 55, or
maybe even 60, Mr. Pernikoff taught Hebrew language in seventh, eighth, and
ninth grades for many years, and he stressed verb and gender issues. But like
most teenagers, I only studied for the tests – and not for “hey-you’re-really-going-to-want-to-know-this-in-50
years.”
We’ve learned that we can learn new things
and new ways of doing things we thought we knew. Who would have believed that
the most important equipment on a car are not the gas and the brakes but the
gas and the horn? Also, if you have a handicap tag on your car, you are allowed
to park for free not only in spaces on the streets but also on the sidewalk. You
are actually encouraged to park on the sidewalk, as long as you do not impede
pedestrian traffic. Try explaining that to a Baltimore City policeman. By the
way, Nefesh B’Nefesh said it would take six months to get the handicap tag.
With a little help from the local governing council, who sent someone to our
apartment to assist me with the application, it took less than two hours to get
the approval. And, I was told that since the car was now in the system I was entitled
to park on the sidewalks even before receiving the actual tag. I think it
helped that it was between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, and the person who got
the application was looking to do something on the right side of the scale.
We’ve almost solved the Israeli healthcare
system that gets so much bad press. It is really no more complicated than
figuring out which insurance company you should sign up for and what it will
cover. So far, with the exceptions of MRI scheduling and physical therapy
appointments, as well as navigating the language barrier, we have not had to
wait too long for any appointments. For example, Janet had great difficulty
finding someone to help her schedule a hearing test. She asked multiple people
to have the person who speaks English call her, until being told there was no
English speaker in that department. She finally caved in and asked our son Noah
for assistance. The next week, he called and told her she could have an
appointment next Sunday or Monday. Of course, the person conducting the test
asked if she preferred English or Hebrew, and at the end told her she had
“perfect hearing for a person of her age.” What a backhanded compliment.
My MRI experience was more frustrating. The
doctor wanted images of my post-fusion back and my hip. Hadassah Hospital told
me that hips are done on Mt. Scopus but backs are done at Ein Kerem, which
meant two appointments three months apart. We called a hospital in Ashdod, and
they said they could do them on the same day, but at noon and 8 p.m. Finally,
the day before we were set to go to Ashdod, I received a call from the nurse
asking about allergies, etc. I asked her why, if I was already in the machine, couldn’t
they just take all the necessary images at the same time? She agreed that two
separate appointments made no sense and said she would get back to me. A couple
hours later, the tests were scheduled to be done back-to-back at 7:30 p.m. and
8:00 p.m. It all worked out, and except for some language issues, the tests
were fine. The doctor did not understand why Janet and I laughed when he said
he was checking to make sure that “I did not have a screw loose.”
Idiomatic expressions, by the way, are a
problem. I now understand that the Hebrew equivalent of “the third time’s the
charm” is “third time ice cream.” But I will never get them all right, nor will
I be able to explain all English ones to Hebrew speakers, regardless of how
well they think they speak English.
* * *
The war has created its own unusual medical
problems. I am not speaking of the casualties and the difficult discussions
everyone has. I am talking about those appointments you set up months in
advance, such as the standard annual or semi-annual exams. A day or two before
the appointment, you get a call that says the doctor is in millu’im (reserve duty) and you need to reschedule. There is no way
you can complain when someone is defending the country, even if he is sitting
in a hospital in Tel Aviv.
And of course, there is no way to put in
writing the tremendous amount of emotional suffering people in this country are
going through. Even couples like us, whose kids are well past army age, begin
every conversation with others with questions about which members of their
family are in and where they are/were serving. For some, it is a multi-generational
concern. Even families where the soldier has a nice safe office job – army
intelligence, for example – suffer from overexposure to what they see every day.
As I’ve previously mentioned, the spouses at
home are going through hell, too. They have children who want to see their
father or mother and ask about them all the time,.This only multiplies the
concern for where that spouse is and when he/she will return home. The army
provides lots of help for those coming out of service, but those who are at
home are not taken care of by the army. They have to rely on volunteer groups. There
are lots of them, though, and they all deserve much support and credit.
* * *
When we moved to Efrat, people made numerous
comments about the safety of living over the “Green Line” or, as we refer to
it, the “1948 cease fire line.” A funny thing about this ongoing war is that we
live in the safest part of the country measured by time in shelters and safe
rooms. Other than the first day of the war and the two missile launches from
Iran, when the entire country was sent into shelters, we have only had one
siren warning to enter our safe room. And because of our location, we have a
leisurely 90 seconds to get there. It doesn’t sound like a long time, but when
you only need to move 20 feet, it is. Our son in Raanana has it much bigger problem – only 60 seconds – and being in an
old building, the only shelter is in the basement, five flights down. With
three children, that is hard. They have also experienced many, many more nights
with sirens.
For those who do not know, you no longer need
to rely the city’s sirens. The Home Front app sends notices to your phone. And
for those too lazy to install the app, the phone company can send notices to
all phones in designated areas that consist of the sound of sirens and a flash.
For Shabbat, people are instructed to leave their phones plugged in and on
silent mode. If there is an alert, the phone will go off, and you will hear it.
Israeli tech! It’s not as spectacular as exploding pagers, but it saves lives.
The war in Israel notwithstanding, the news
from around the world is scarier than our daily lives. We read of antisemitic
attacks – acts reminiscent of Kristallnacht – in places formerly considered
safe, like Australia, the Netherlands, Canada, and the UK. I have a whole list
of places that I am not happy with. I’ve given up Irish whiskey (with or
without the “e”), Norwegian salmon, Australian sheepskin, etc. I am even
thinking of giving up Belgian chocolate, though that may be a step too far. I
am not advocating boycotts; these are my personal decisions based on what these
countries’ governments are saying about the current war. I believe that Lewis
Carroll’s Humpty Dumpty was correct when he wrote, “When I use a word it means
just what I choose it to mean – neither more nor less.” Before October 7th,
genocide was a defined term. Now it means Jewish people defending themselves
from a war of aggression. The really insulting thing is being accused of
genocide but at the same time not being very good at it. Twenty thousand
Hungarian Jews were killed daily in Auschwitz using 1940s technology. Even
using Hamas numbers, in 15 months, Israel has killed just over two days-worth
of people, including terrorists and civilians. Pretty poor performance for a High-Tech
Nation.
* * *
Since our son was released from millu’im for the rest of 2024, our lives
are almost totally normal. Yes, our safe room is stocked with water and snacks,
flashlights, batteries, and an old transistor radio (remember those?!) as
Spotify does not make the appropriate announcements. But, except to hang
laundry, we rarely go into that room. We regularly visit my mother, may she
live and be well to 120, as we plan her 98th birthday next month. Last
week, we were in Yerushalayim three times as I had cousins visiting from the U.S.
and wanted to spend time with them. We go out to dinner, and we even go away
for a change of scenery. Two weeks ago, we took the entire family to a villa in
Netanya for Shabbat. They needed time to decompress as well. After that, we
took the next three nights in Herzliya to recover from all the company and
excitement!
Restaurants and hotels continue to be
depressing places since they are mostly empty due to the lack of tourists. In Herzliya,
we got a free upgrade to an executive suite because guests are so rare. The
hotel does have a set 30% occupancy for displaced persons from the north, just
no other guests. Janet and I were in a nice restaurant this week. We were
early, 5:30 p.m., so the fact that only one other couple was there was not too
surprising. But, when we left at almost 7:00 p.m., only one additional couple was
eating.
* * *
Now for some positive conclusions.
·
We are in Israel and have no fear of walking around with a kippah on, even when there are
anti-government rallies going on.
·
There is no doubt in any Israeli’s mind, except Ehud Barak’s, that
Israel is fighting a defensive war it did not seek and that needs to come to a
conclusion with a different outcome than the last two Gaza wars.
·
There are no Israelis who do not think of the hostages every day. Some
may be more outspoken. Some wear their dog tags inside their shirts, others
outside. Some put tape with the number of days on their shirts. There are
disagreements about the price that should be paid for the hostages, and lots of
those discussions cite Responsa from long ago. It is not a new question. I
agree with an answer given by a Knesset member who said, “If it were my family
member, I would be outside demanding that any offer be accepted, but when I am
a member of Knesset, I demand that we win this war.”
·
There is no question that Israel needs each and every one of you. If
you are able and if you can find an affordable flight, come and visit. Believe
it or not, it’s still the most amazing place to be.
·
Finally, there has not been a single day in two-and-a-half years that
we have questioned our decision to make aliyah.
Even 15 months of war has not changed our view that this is the place for us.
