One of the only jobs on this earth where a person is veritably on call 24/7 is the occupation of a shadchan. As such, when a woman starts making shidduchim, she will find herself a nomenclator for landmarks around the world – landmarks named after her dating couples: some who get married and some who don’t. Dating singles have these landmarks as well, but from a different angle, and singles’ parents do as well.

The story began as most crazy, hair-raising stories begin, with a wedding.

My sister met her bashert, b”H, and was engaged to be married in Atlanta Georgia, on July Fourth weekend, 2020. As Georgia was her chassan’s home state, and the first state to open up restrictions on in-person events for over 10 people, it seemed the obvious choice after months of debate about where to hold the simcha. When we were looking up flights, we found that, due to the dearth of flights during the heart of the Covid-19 pandemic, prices were sky high. We had a choice between Spirit, which is less reliable and has more stopovers, or Southwest, with its steep price. After much debate, we decided on Southwest Airlines and booked the tickets.

Diego Rivera,* the owner of a popular 7-11 was having a regular long spring day when, all of a sudden, the doors to his convenience store were flung open, warm air rushing behind. It was a young man who seemed agitated while trying to appear calm, cool, and collected. Decked out in a suit, white shirt, shined shoes, and tie, the young man came running in asking for assistance.

February 11, 2020 was a very special day for the sixth through eighth graders of the Torah Institute of Baltimore. TI entered 64 middle school competitors (14 teams) who created and programmed unique robots in the first annual CIJE Robotics competition in Maryland. The boys spent over five months of recess time in addition to evening meetings at host parents’ homes to build the robots and program them to implement assigned tasks. The Yeshiva of Greater Washington and Talmudical Academy of Baltimore came to Torah Institute’s preschool gym to compete in the robotics competition.

The students of Torah Institute are given ample opportunities to shine in all areas. Dr. Suzanne Cotter, the English Department Coordinator of TI, has been at the forefront in embracing CIJE (Center for Initiatives in Jewish Education) as a curriculum partner. The CIJE has been an amazing resource, providing the students with updated curricula in English studies as well as implementing STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering and Math) deep into the curriculum. This gives the boys of the Torah Institute of Baltimore an opportunity to tap into their many academic strengths in high-interest fields, in this case engineering and robotics. TI was therefore honored to volunteer to host the first-ever CIJE Robotics tournament. 

I have been helping a man to find a shidduch for the past few years. Over the course of these years, I have counseled him through dating situations, and have seen his growth and understanding of what really should matter in a future wife. He recently approached me with a letter he wrote, and asked if I could find a way to publicize it to help others who might need to hear the advice he has only recently taken to heart but wishes he had sooner. I took his letter, which we discussed at length, and also took note of his feelings and thoughts. We have combined the two, which leaves us with this brutally honest letter to share. In the process of these years of searching, he has managed to find himself, and would like to share his thoughts and experiences with as many people as possible.

Most of you have read a plethora of shidduch articles. Usually, they are loaded with advice and guidance for your typical girl or boy “in the parsha” or, to put it in plain English, dating eligible. Well, all you singles out there can breathe a sigh of relief, because this article is not about more advice for you. Rather, it is aimed at everyone else: the typical neighbor, friend, doctor, coworker, mailman, butcher, uncle’s friend’s neighbor’s cousin – even the parrot! – of a single, dating-aged person! Basically, anyone with the ability to talk should keep reading.