Page 84 - issue
P. 84
SHADCHANASKTHE shalom bayis and always made time for
IA Shidduch Question: BY MASHE KATZ us children.
grew up in a frum family, and over
the years, my three brothers have who know us, are hesitant to suggest I can’t explain why my brothers did
left our family’s ways. Only my sis- anything. It has come to me through the what they did. The oldest one had some
ter and I are still frum. Of course, my grapevine that people are afraid to redt issues with learning disabilities, but the
parents are extremely upset about shidduchim for me, because they think other two may have just copied him. It
their sons, although we do still have there must be something terribly wrong might sound crazy, but it could be that
a relationship with them. Now that with my family. our home was so accepting that they felt
I am ready to look for a shidduch, a need to push the boundaries, or may-
however, they are worried. I am also wor- Truthfully, as far as I can tell, nothing be they are just lazy and attracted by the
ried. I can tell that the local shadchanim, is wrong with my family. We are very av- non-frum lifestyle. I don’t know. Bot-
erage. In income and everything else, we tom line: I am being judged by what my
are like most families in the communi- brothers did. What do I do now?
ty. My parents work hard, but they have
IThe Shadchan Answers:
must say, this an unusual question.
Before I begin, I would like to point
out that if someone has learning
challenges, it does not mean that he
cannot be frum. We all know peo-
ple who have such challenges; they
may not be the biggest learners, but
they are extremely frum and obser-
vant and have tremendous family rela-
tionships. One cannot make a blanket
statement that this is the cause of your
brother’s straying from the path.
76 u www.wherewhatwhen.com u
IA Shidduch Question: BY MASHE KATZ us children.
grew up in a frum family, and over
the years, my three brothers have who know us, are hesitant to suggest I can’t explain why my brothers did
left our family’s ways. Only my sis- anything. It has come to me through the what they did. The oldest one had some
ter and I are still frum. Of course, my grapevine that people are afraid to redt issues with learning disabilities, but the
parents are extremely upset about shidduchim for me, because they think other two may have just copied him. It
their sons, although we do still have there must be something terribly wrong might sound crazy, but it could be that
a relationship with them. Now that with my family. our home was so accepting that they felt
I am ready to look for a shidduch, a need to push the boundaries, or may-
however, they are worried. I am also wor- Truthfully, as far as I can tell, nothing be they are just lazy and attracted by the
ried. I can tell that the local shadchanim, is wrong with my family. We are very av- non-frum lifestyle. I don’t know. Bot-
erage. In income and everything else, we tom line: I am being judged by what my
are like most families in the communi- brothers did. What do I do now?
ty. My parents work hard, but they have
IThe Shadchan Answers:
must say, this an unusual question.
Before I begin, I would like to point
out that if someone has learning
challenges, it does not mean that he
cannot be frum. We all know peo-
ple who have such challenges; they
may not be the biggest learners, but
they are extremely frum and obser-
vant and have tremendous family rela-
tionships. One cannot make a blanket
statement that this is the cause of your
brother’s straying from the path.
76 u www.wherewhatwhen.com u
