A Topsy-Turvy Purim

I remember Purim last year, when we all sat in shul listening to the Megillah. No one thought about “social distancing” as we broke our fast together in packed social halls. The term hadn’t been invented.. Those successive urgent email messages from the Agudath Israel hadn’t begun yet either. And masks and gloves were still primarily worn by doctors and nurses. But before too long, the world as we knew it had completely changed, and we started to wonder when it would ever be the same again. Remarkably, our lives began to transform in good ways, too. We became more focused on davening, and our learning had more meaning than ever before. We rose to the challenges that Hashem put before us and forged ahead.

And here we are a year later. We continue to weather the storm, doing what we have to do. Purim is around the corner, and we now know that it won’t be the same as last year. What will it be like? I spent some time talking with esteemed rabbis as well as to members of our community to find out.

Rabbis Inspire

Rabbi Jonathan Seidemann, Rabbi of Kehilath B’nai Torah, says his shul is working on a contingency plan to accommodate all members for the Megillah leining. The greatest challenge is doing this while maintaining social distancing. Rabbi Seidemann urges us to have “tremendous hakaras hatov to the Ribono Shel Olam,” Who gave scientists and doctors the ability to create a vaccine in a few months, rather than the several years it would normally take. It’s nothing short of miraculous,” he says. So rather than feeling sad that we have to celebrate Purim in a COVID atmosphere, Rabbi Seidemann thinks it’s better to look at this Yom Tov as “the greatest chizuk, the greatest reassurance, and the greatest strengthening in serious times such as these,” because although it may seem that Hashem’s love is hidden from us, His love for us is here.

According to Rabbi Daniel Rose, Rabbi of Bnai Jacob Shaarei Zion, this year, we can focus on elevating the mitzvas we do on Purim to a higher level. “Purim is an extremely important day,” says Rabbi Rose. “The laughter, shtick, and the sense of things being upside down are what we automatically associate with Purim, and correctly so. But those are just some of the ways through which we access this day that can have an impact on our entire year. There are a lot of facets to making the most of Purim. There’s such an opportunity for growth on Purim that we can’t afford to just ‘throw in the towel,’ so to speak, on our spiritual accomplishments. Maybe this is the Purim where we pay more attention to our davening or Torah learning than we ever did before. Maybe this is the Purim where we pay more attention to our matanos la’evyonim than we do to our shalach manos. Maybe it’s a Purim where we can focus on calling people just to say hello, as Hashem reached out to us when we couldn’t see His face, but He made His presence known. There’s a very strong idea on Purim to reach out to people who feel unnoticed. We can make them feel a part of things. All these opportunities exist every Purim, but we don’t usually pay attention to them.”

We can add meaning to the mitzvas we do already, says Rabbi Rose. “Shalach manos has turned into a checklist of sorts where boxes are checked off the list as we drop them off, a drop-and-run kind of mitzva. It’s not really what this mitzva is supposed to be. It’s supposed to be a vehicle for engendering closeness. A suggestion is to think differently about our shalach manos, to pay more attention to bringing shalach manos to someone who is lonely or alone. Or visiting with a neighbor we never pay much attention to. Walk over to their house and spend five or ten minutes speaking with them while standing safely outside. Turning shalach manos into more of that kind of mitzvah can be very meaningful.

“What we shouldn’t do is to tell ourselves that we’re not going to spend the 24 hours of Purim to its fullest,” Rabbi Rose concludes. “There’s too much potential for us to just say ‘not this year,’ and not to take advantage of the potential Purim has to offer. It’s different this year, and there’s so much room for growth. It’s a very special day and we have to make the most of it in whatever way we can.”

Throughout the pandemic, Rabbi Sruli Motzen, the Rabbi of Ner Tamid, has held outdoor minyanim for Mincha and Maariv, which are of shorter duration, so that people would not be outside in the cold for long. Rabbi Motzen is in the process of arranging outdoor Megillah leining. Sign-up forms will ensure that everyone who prefers to hear the Megillah outside will be able to do so.

Rabbi Motzen related some Purim thoughts: “There’s a Rambam which is often quoted that says that it’s more important to give to the poor than to give more mishloch manos. There’s no greater simcha than doing so. This is not limited to gifts to the poor. Broadly speaking, it includes looking out for people who would otherwise be isolated. Purim is an opportunity to reach out…and on a Purim like this, all the more so.

“We’re all suffering, we’re all struggling, and everyone is having a hard time. There are people who may have certain challenges and difficulties. Through COVID, Hashem has presented us with an opportunity to think a little bit differently about how we reach out to those people.”

Individuals Step Up

For 40 years, Rabbi Moshe Juravel, founder and director of the Megilla Connection, has been recruiting volunteers from all over the community to lein the Megillah to people who cannot go to shul. During usual times, Rabbi Juravel arranges about 40 leinings during Purim. Last year, with the start of COVID, that number jumped to 60. The criteria for entering someone’s home to lein have changed. The person has to have had COVID within 90 days or already have antibodies. Rabbi Juravel hopes that as more people get the vaccine, more people will attend the leining in shul. He is not sure how people will feel this year about letting members of the Megilla Connection come into their homes. Time will tell.

Mordy Goodman,* in his unassuming manner, collects money each year during Purim to give to a single family in need of assistance. Focusing on only one family gives Mordy a tremendous opportunity to significantly impact someone’s life. He speaks to several rabbanim before Purim and asks them to choose a family that would benefit from his help, insisting that the beneficiary remain anonymous.

Interestingly, Mordy does not collect door-to-door . He has a system, figured out over the years, of how to be at the right place at the right time, according to the schedules of each minyan. COVID is going to have an impact on Mordy’s collecting this year. He is not sure if shuls will welcome non-members on Purim. He isn’t convinced it’s the correct thing to do during COVID anyway. On top of everything else, Mordy will have less time to collect money because Purim this year falls on a Friday, and the Yom Tov day will be much shorter. 

Mordy’s not sure at this point exactly how he will collect funds. He may stop and ask people for donations while driving around his neighborhood. But even doing that is tricky; these days, no one wants to be approached. Because of this unusual situation, Mordy says he may notify some people in advance. But whatever the difficulties, Mordy is determined to figure it out. With his upbeat personality andtenacity, Mordy Goodman won’t stop until he finds a way to ensure that one family in our community receives the help they need this Purim.

Community Members Make Plans

Yehudis Barer is expecting a subdued Purim. Although she usually enjoys baking cookies for shalach manos and giving them to friends and family, this year she will be buying treats and giving them only to her family. She wonders what the shuls will be doing for Megillah leining and notes that probably no one will be letting bachurin into their homes to collect tzedaka.

“Purim is going to be different but not depressing,” says Yehudis. “It’s going to make people think that the previous year was our last little bit of normalcy.” Yehudis notes the contrast between this year and last year. People were thinking of COVID last year, she says, but it hadn’t hit home here in Baltimore, so no one was really worried about it. It makes us think that we just don’t know what’s coming our way. “We don’t know what life has in store and what Hashem has planned for us. You can’t take anything for granted. I think we’re at the one-day-at–a-time mode of thinking.”

For many years, Rochel Berman, has attended the Purim seudah in her son and daughter-in- law’s home. Since COVID, she has only seen her family once and that was outside in their sukkah. Throughout the pandemic, her son and family have followed the advice of one of the rebbeim in their shul, Rabbi Dr. Aaron Glatt, who is Chief of Infectious Diseases at Mount Sinai South Nassau. Rochel will be vaccinated by Purim and her son will ask a shailah to determine whether she will be able to attend their seudah.

Rochel said her children’s Purim seudah will not be the same as it was before COVID. Her son and daughter- in-law plan on keeping the seudah small but will be sure to make it festive for their children. The whole family will dress up in an organized theme. The parents will not make shalach manos this year, but, depending on the rabbinic decision and the rules of their school, the children may be allowed to make limited packages for some of their classmates and teachers. Although this day will be dramatically different from other years, one major component will stay the same: Rochel Berman’s family plans on being b’simcha this Purim.

Well, it remains to be seen what Purim will actually look like this year in Baltimore. We know it will be different, unlike any one we have ever seen. I have a sneaking suspicion though, that we won’t be let down. Perhaps we can go above and beyond to try and make this a Purim to remember – maybe not in ways we are used to but better than ever. We’ll just have to wait and see.

*Name has been changed.