As Elul
moves closer, we start to prepare for our kids traveling to Israel to learn in
yeshiva or seminary or to engage in other programs. At 18 or 19 years old, our
kids are in late adolescence, a developmental period often marked by desires to
explore new interests, take chances, challenge established values, and become
more independent. For some kids, it is also a prime time for substance use.
We
often think about risks for substance use increasing during times of
transition, like moving from middle school to high school, or high school to
college. Advancing from high school to full-time learning in Israel might also be
considered a significant transition for some kids.
To
be clear, we have no idea about the extent of substance use that occurs when
kids learn in Israel. There is simply no data to support any opinion. We might
expect vulnerability to substance use to vary from person to person, perhaps
even from yeshiva to yeshiva, depending on their policies toward it. In the
merit of precaution, let us consider several aspects of the Israel experience
that could impact decisions to use substances, and what we can do about it.
Substance
availability: It
is possible that alcohol, e-cigarettes, and cannabis are more accessible to
kids in Israel than in Baltimore. The legal minimum age in Israel for drinking
and smoking (e-cigarettes or combustible cigarettes) is 18 years old, three
years younger than the U.S. We know that over a fifth of adult Israelis smoke
cigarettes, about double the rate of U.S. smoking, suggesting that smoking is
viewed as more normative. Cannabis use in Israel is decriminalized, which
essentially means that it is ignored until someone has a problem. What all of
this means is that there is a strong likelihood that our kids will find
substances more readily available in Israel and will have more opportunities to
use them.
Less adult monitoring:
Unless we
accompany our kids to Israel, they will lack direct parental supervision. Adult
supervision is transferred to the rabbis and teachers of the yeshivas and
seminaries. While they will certainly do their best, they cannot follow our
kids around the country, and perhaps more importantly, they have their own kids
to worry about! It is not surprising that kids without supervision are at more
risk to use substances.
Peer pressure: We can view peer pressure in at
least two ways. The first and most obvious is that kids influence others to use
substances through various forms of encouragement. The second and less obvious
involves a kind of misperception. Our kids tend to overestimate the substances
used by their peers. Social media exposure adds to this problem. For some kids,
I would imagine, peer pressure may be difficult to withstand. It is perfectly
understandable that our kids want to fit in with other students, especially
when far from home.
Emotional demands: For some kids, Israel can be
emotionally draining. It is not uncommon to feel homesick, with some developing
symptoms of anxiety or depression. These problems may be more acute for kids
who travel to Israel with existing mental health concerns. Adjustment problems
might also occur if the yeshiva or seminary is not a good match. While
unpleasant feelings may be normal, they might also trigger substance use as a
coping mechanism.
None
of this is cause for alarm. Most kids have productive and healthy years in
Israel, with some spending more time there than originally anticipated. The
years spent learning and growing in yeshiva and seminary may provide an
important foundation of stability prior to entering college or other settings
where substance use is common.
It
is probably fair to say that the kids who are most at risk are those with
pre-existing substance use concerns. For these kids, the benefits of learning
in Israel must be balanced with the potential harms from more substance use. Delaying
the learning experience until more stability is achieved might be appropriate. There
are also yeshivas and seminaries that have more experience
with kids with these backgrounds.
For
those with pre-existing ADHD or mental health conditions, it is important to
consider strategies to help them adhere to prescribed medications. You won’t be
there to remind them! It is also worthwhile to become familiar with resources
at their school or elsewhere in Israel where a child can go if they experience
worrisome psychological symptoms.
We
need to articulate our expectations to refrain from substance use. These
expectations have a huge impact! Similarly, it seems important to provide
general substance use and harm-reduction education, and to help our kids
consider ways to fight peer pressure. We should also convey that most kids do
not drink, vape, or smoke pot, no matter what they have heard from friends or
social media.
Finally,
it is a good idea to have an emergency contact in Israel. Of course, most
school registration forms ask for this contact, but consider who your child
would be comfortable speaking with in the event of a crisis. Setting up a
conversation with the Israeli contact before the trip might increase the
likelihood that your child will call if necessary.
