When my coworker Haviva Bulka first mentioned that she was housing Baltimore’s new Proposal Gemach, my curiosity was piqued. What in the world is a proposal gemach? Does it make volunteers available to propose for you if you are as shy as Miles Standish? Legend has it that the leader of the Pilgrims wanted to marry Pricilla Mullins but lacked the confidence to propose. Instead, he sent his friend John Alden to pop the question. When John conveyed Miles’ proposal, Pricilla said, “Speak for yourself, John.” They got married and lived happily ever after – John and Pricilla, that is. I soon learned that the Proposal Gemach does nothing of the sort.
“When we moved
into our new house recently, we decided we wanted to host some sort of a gemach,” shares Haviva. “At the same
time, I saw an ad placed by the New York head of the Proposal Gemach, who was
looking for someone to host a branch in Baltimore. So, we decided to host it.”
To
date (no pun intended!), Baltimore’s Proposal Gemach has serviced 10 “proposers”
by lending them a full set of props – all packed neatly in one container. The
Gemach owns two sets, which are housed at the Bulkas’ home and lent out free of
charge to anyone in need. The following items are included in a set: one round
table and chairs, a tablecloth, two champagne flutes, a red carpet, 24
heart-shaped tea lights, two lanterns, five battery-operated candles, a galvanized
bucket, “Marry Me” letters, rose petals, and a speaker for music. They even
have “Will You” lights to add to the “Marry Me,” which were kindly donated by
someone.
The Proposal
Gemach was created as the perfect solution to help chasanim (grooms) who don’t have the time and money to prepare for
their special moment. It was started less than a year ago in a garage in
Brooklyn by two young guys and only one set of props. It has since expanded
nationwide – to Lakewood, Florida, Monsey, Los Angeles, Dallas, Queens, the
Five Towns, and Passaic. Locations in Chicago and numerous locations in Israel
are in the works. Already, it has helped facilitate the proposals of over 230 chasanim!
The founders’ goal
is to take the Proposal Gemach one step further by offering everything from
discounted services of affiliated photographers, florists, and jewelers to
assisting with limousine service for the chasan
and kallah. It also helps couples who
need assistance with essential household items.
“At the moment, we
can lend out two sets of props at the same time,” says Haviva, “but if there’s
a need, we will get more sets.” She adds that many out-of-town people – from
New York, New Jersey, and Silver Spring – borrow the props. “That way, they don’t
have to shlep props with them when proposing in Baltimore. We even have ‘Will
you marry me?’ lights, which were kindly donated by someone. Other people have
also donated their leftover props and supplies. It’s wonderful to be part of
the excitement of the simcha, to speak to the chasan and/or his friends before and after the proposal, and to get
pictures of the setup.”
To borrow a set of
props from the Proposal Gemach – or to donate to help keep the Gemach running –
please contact Haviva at 443-858-4864.
Holding up the World
The word gemach is an acronym for the Hebrew term
gemilus chasadim – the act of “bestowing
kindnesses,” which are mentioned in Pirkei
Avos 1:2, together with Torah study and prayer, as one of the three pillars
upon whose merit the world is sustained. Our local gemachs are a brilliant expression of this concept. Gemachs bring us together as a community,
they are an example of chesed for our
children to follow, and they teach us to be givers – while also reminding us
that it’s okay to rely on others at times. That, too, is a chesed!
Gemachs eliminate the need to buy expensive or
bulky items used only occasionally – like a crib, car-top carrier, or chain saw.
They can also be convenient, saving us from running to the store for candles on
erev Shabbos or rescuing on Yom Tov
when we ran out of candles. (Just drop in to the candle gemach.) Whether you need
something as familiar as a mezuzah or as uncommon as an emergency electric sump
pump, there is most likely a gemach for
it. Here are just a few more of the many gemachs
in Baltimore.
Are You Game?
While working up
to your proposal, you may want to check out Aliza Glickstein’s game gemach, where you can choose from about
350 games to play on your date.
As a longtime
educator, Aliza has a passion for working with children and furthering their
education. “When I moved to Baltimore as a new baalas teshuva, I discovered the beautiful concept of a gemach. Combining my teaching background
with my desire to do chesed, I
created the Baltimore Game Gemach.” Starting with a small stack of games in the
corner of her living room, over the last four years the Game Gemach has grown
exponentially.
Currently, the
Game Gemach offers many different types of games suitable for all ages –
preschool to adult. “We have many popular games and also exciting games you’ve
probably never played before,” notes Aliza. “We are also expanding our
selection of dating games and escape room games…We have received a large
year-round response from families and singles who want to try new games during
Shabbos and Yomim Tovim. In addition, many program coordinators and shuls
choose a bunch of games to use during their events.
“It is always a
heartwarming experience to see the excited expression on the faces of the
children and adults who come to explore our vast array of free and super fun games!”
concludes Aliza. “We look forward to continuing to serve Baltimore families,
singles, and community events.”
The Game Gemach
will be holding its first Game Camp on erev
Shabbos for elementary-aged girls. Call Aliza Glickstein at 267-210-7478 or
text alizacare4you@gmail.com for more information.
Illness: It All Depends
Baltimore’s
numerous gemachs are not all fun and
games. Adira Benklifa has housed several gemachs
in the past and was looking for another gemach
opportunity when she noticed Shoshana Fishkind’s Neshei Pickwick post. “I
called her, and she explained that a Depends undergarment gemach was needed,” Adira recalls. “It’s a good fit for me because
I work from home and have extra storage in my Heather Ridge apartment. I told
her I’d gladly help.”
As of now, there
are about 20 packages available in various sizes, and Adira has more donors than
clients. She is hoping this article will bring awareness to people in the
community who need this product. “People are appreciative,” mentions Adira. “Some
people are fortunate to get these products at a discount, either through their
insurer or through Medicare. For those who don’t, it is very expensive so I’m
happy to help. Everything is confidential and drop-offs are available if
needed.”
With COVID taking
center stage these past two years, the Bogarts started a pulse oximeter gemach. (Who ever heard of pulse
oximeters a couple of years ago?) “My husband got COVID,” says Rivka Bogart.
“He was fine for four days. On the fifth day, he got a little worse. I thought he
was okay, but a friend asked if she could come over with a pulse oximeter,
which measures the level of oxygen in the blood as well as the pulse. It turned
out that his oxygen was very low, and his pulse was very high. I called the
doctor, who said we needed to go to the emergency room right away. That tiny
device that fits on a fingertip likely saved his life.” Rivka went home and
immediately bought five pulse oximeters to lend to others. If you need one, call
the Bogarts at 410-978-0460.
Binyamin Heinemann
(410-585-1451) runs the Keep the Smile Gemach, which lends PlayStation®
Portable (PSP) and Nintendo DS players for children who are in a hospital or
homebound. The gemach also has many
other entertainment related items. For more information, visit:
www.KeepTheSmile.org.
And did you know
that Yehuda Mond runs a music gemach that
discreetly provides in-person musical entertainment for hospital-bound children
and adults. He also makes connections with local and known vocalists to bring a
well-needed respite and distraction from the stresses that accompany illness.
Contact him at 410-402-4592.
On a Happy Note
Speaking of music,
there is also a Simcha Sound Gemach run by the Marvin family (410-585-1700)
that provides a wireless PA system for simchos. And, if you are in need of a sheitel to wear to a simcha, Mrs. Orna
Levin (410-358-3045) started the Sheitel Gemach. Call her to borrow or donate a
sheitel.
Baltimore even
boasts not one, but two chicken soup gemachs.
Mrs. Esther Shoshana Fuld’s Chicken Soup Gemach (410-318-8315) gives out the
soup for those who are ill, and Mrs. Evelyn Shnier (410-358-7532) provides homemade
chicken soup not only in case of illness but also for unexpected guests, etc. in
memory of Leah bas Aaron. Her soup is all-natural; no salt or MSG is added.
We are fortunate
to live in a community where a gemach
can be found for just about everything from nuts to soup, literally! But if you
happen to think of something that is not
yet covered by a gemach, don’t be
shy! Start one yourself!
