Every Yiddle – and non-Yiddle – is familiar with the term “oy vay.” Right? However, the term “fahlsh vee der velt” (false like the world) may be unfamiliar. In the Yiddish world, when the veracity of a statement or deed is questionable, the term fahlsh vee dehr velt may be used. Nu, you may ask, for example? So here are a few examples of some past and present happenings where fahlsh vee dehr velt is applicable:

If you review the current newspapers, you will notice that nation after nation condemns Israel for defending herself. Never mind that Israel has contributed a vast amount of technology that is used by these very same nations. But instead of appreciation, Israel receives criticism. Ahn althe miseh (nothing new under the sun). Truth be told, the more the Jewish people contribute to the nations of the world, the greater they show malice instead of good will. Fahrvoss (why)? you may ask. Because of jealousy, what else?

Someone asked recently how I remember things that occurred so many years ago. A good question! But, as any “senior citizen” can tell you, some folks remember things that happened “in Noah’s time,” so to speak, but are capable of forgetting where they placed the car keys!

The Yamim Nora’im (High Holidays) were practiced traditionally in East Baltimore, as they are practiced today, but they had a different “flavor.” To begin with, observant Yidden could be counted on your fingers. There was no large religious community spirit as there is today in Jewish neighborhoods. The rabbis who lived in East Baltimore in the 40s and 50s included Rabbi Forshlager, Rabbi Vitsick, Rabbi Levin, Rabbi Katznelson, Rabbi Tabori, Rabbi Pliskin, Rabbi Axelrod, and other prominent rabbanim.    

Hello to all readers: Nu, what can I tell you?. The Ribono Shel Olam created many creatures, and I was one of them. Why he gave me six legs, vehr vais (who knows)? Go ask questions…

Thank G-d, I found myself living in the household of a shomer Shabbos – how I got into this house, vehr gedenkt (who remembers) – but I eventually suffered from anti-Semitism, nevertheless.

One morning, a Yid named Isaac was reviewing sedra of the week, so I peeked into the Chumash he was holding. Who says a stink bug doesn’t deserve to learn? For some reason, my thin legs faltered, and I tumbled onto the page of the sedra and got all shook up! Nu, even a stink bug needs mazel!

“So, how long have you been writing like that?” asked the meshulach. (charity collector) recently, when I carelessly revealed myself to be a lefty while making out his check.

“Voss fahr ah frageh (what kind of question) are you asking?” I responded – whereupon, he began to list the virtues of being right-handed. Did the amount about to be written on the check take a nosedive? you may ask. Ich gedenk nisht. (I don’t remember) – an old Reagan (another lefty!) response. However, the meshulach’s comment did prompt recollections of my life as a “lefty.” Here are a few episodes that come to mind:*

Nu, you may ask, what type of title is “Maid for a Day”? A good question. There once was a television program called “Queen for a Day.” (Does anyone remember?) It made a tsimmis (big deal) of one lucky lady from the TV audience who was chosen to be queen and receive her special wish – anything from a special bed for a handicapped child to a housekeeper to replace her while she recovered from surgery. She got many other prizes, too. The audience ah-ed and oo-ed as the gifts were presented, making all the vibelach (wives) jealous. When she received a free trip to the Bahamas, the olam went wild with envy.

So you’re telling me there were Yidden in East Baltimore?” my neighbor asked me. I assured him that there was a large Jewish population in East Baltimore (alias Downtown) and that life there had its own unique flavor. “Nu,” said he, “I’ll take a trip and see for myself.”

And what was so special about East Baltimore? A good question, and perhaps after reading this geshichteh (story), you’ll also want to tour East Baltimore and see for yourself.

The Bais Hamedresh Hagadol, located on Baltimore and Chester Streets, was a prominent shul. The building, including the cornerstone, still exists. Members varied from