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Apply Your Yeshiva/ Seminary Credits or The Right Words
Your Rabbinic/ Secular Degree Toward:
Skillful Affirmation
An Accredited BACHELORS DEGREE The next point is one which really cannot be stressed
enough, and that is knowing how to couch certain points as
BS in Business well as how to state certain facts and how not to state them.
BS in Behavioral Science/ Human Services
BS in Software Development As an example, most people are of average intelligence,
BS in Cyber Security (and other computer related fields) not brilliant. That is normal. Yet if one is asked on a call if a
young man or woman did well academically, and the reply is
Additional Majors are available: contact YIEP not an overwhelming yes, the shidduch is probably going to
be over and done with before it gets a fair chance. Even if the
• Apply up to 70 Judaic credits in transfer toward NEW! young man or woman on the other side is of equally average
the required 127 credits of the degree BS in Cyber intelligence, and does not really care one way or the other
• Government tuition grants and loans available about having a spouse who attained straight A’s, if one states
• Registration is currently underway Security that the single in question was academically “just okay,” it will
always sound poor and can be the end of the idea.
• New programs begin October & January
As long as the single in question is not objectively unintel-
An Accredited MASTERS DEGREE REGISTER ligent, and didn’t flunk out of school, there’s nothing wrong
TODAY! with saying, “Yes, he/she did well in school.” It really is incon-
MS in Clinical Counseling - Begins in August sequential if the single was an A, B, or even C student. School
MA in Educational Leadership - Begins in October is over, they passed, and saying that they did well is fine.
Master of Business Administration - Begins in October
As it is, most people are not looking for a valedictorian,
Additional Majors are available: contact YIEP and a simple answer confirming that the single did well in
school is perfectly acceptable and the conversation will usu-
• Apply your Bachelors Degree from any regionally accredited, state accredited, ally end there. However, if one waffles on the question, and
the questioner starts to get more specific, it can easily
AARTS or AIJS accredited or affiliated institution become a conversation that is difficult and detrimental to the
• Government student loans available shidduch.
• Registration is currently underway
If the questioner wants specifics about a certain trait
YESHIVA INITIATIVES Bellevue University is accredited by the because they feel it’s important for the specific single on their
EDUCATIONAL PROGRAMS Higher Learning Commission end, they will ask about it and continue to inquire. However,
when the questioner is simply going through a checklist to
Our students have been accepted into many graduate school of the North Central Association of make sure that the single is a regular, normal person, and
programs, including Harvard, Columbia & NYU Colleges and Schools when the matter at hand is really not relevant to the shid-
duch and has little to no bearing on how good a life partner
Earn your degree through ONLINE COURSES, or parent the single will be, and as long as what one is say-
accessible anywhere (in 18-33 months, depending on the degree) ing is not objectively a lie, it is best to simply affirm a gener-
ally positive statement.
TheYIEP@gmail.com | 917-209-8204 | www.theYIEP.com
Skillful Reframing
Similarly, if one is asked about a single in a way that might
de facto put the single in a negative light, it is best to reframe
the answer. For example, if one is asked if a young man or
woman is “quiet,” and the response is yes, that is generally
not something people want to hear, even if the single on the
questioner’s end needs a quiet spouse.
However, if one replies by saying, “No, I think dignified or
tzanua would be a better way to describe him/her,” one has
given the same information but now reframed it in a way that
is much less likely to turn off the person one is talking to.
Choosing non-negative descriptors for middos which may
otherwise be viewed negatively is a skill that must be
acquired when it comes to fielding shidduch calls.
Furthermore, in both of the above examples, these are not
objective qualities. The questioner may feel that a B- is con-
46 u www.wherewhatwhen.com u
Your Rabbinic/ Secular Degree Toward:
Skillful Affirmation
An Accredited BACHELORS DEGREE The next point is one which really cannot be stressed
enough, and that is knowing how to couch certain points as
BS in Business well as how to state certain facts and how not to state them.
BS in Behavioral Science/ Human Services
BS in Software Development As an example, most people are of average intelligence,
BS in Cyber Security (and other computer related fields) not brilliant. That is normal. Yet if one is asked on a call if a
young man or woman did well academically, and the reply is
Additional Majors are available: contact YIEP not an overwhelming yes, the shidduch is probably going to
be over and done with before it gets a fair chance. Even if the
• Apply up to 70 Judaic credits in transfer toward NEW! young man or woman on the other side is of equally average
the required 127 credits of the degree BS in Cyber intelligence, and does not really care one way or the other
• Government tuition grants and loans available about having a spouse who attained straight A’s, if one states
• Registration is currently underway Security that the single in question was academically “just okay,” it will
always sound poor and can be the end of the idea.
• New programs begin October & January
As long as the single in question is not objectively unintel-
An Accredited MASTERS DEGREE REGISTER ligent, and didn’t flunk out of school, there’s nothing wrong
TODAY! with saying, “Yes, he/she did well in school.” It really is incon-
MS in Clinical Counseling - Begins in August sequential if the single was an A, B, or even C student. School
MA in Educational Leadership - Begins in October is over, they passed, and saying that they did well is fine.
Master of Business Administration - Begins in October
As it is, most people are not looking for a valedictorian,
Additional Majors are available: contact YIEP and a simple answer confirming that the single did well in
school is perfectly acceptable and the conversation will usu-
• Apply your Bachelors Degree from any regionally accredited, state accredited, ally end there. However, if one waffles on the question, and
the questioner starts to get more specific, it can easily
AARTS or AIJS accredited or affiliated institution become a conversation that is difficult and detrimental to the
• Government student loans available shidduch.
• Registration is currently underway
If the questioner wants specifics about a certain trait
YESHIVA INITIATIVES Bellevue University is accredited by the because they feel it’s important for the specific single on their
EDUCATIONAL PROGRAMS Higher Learning Commission end, they will ask about it and continue to inquire. However,
when the questioner is simply going through a checklist to
Our students have been accepted into many graduate school of the North Central Association of make sure that the single is a regular, normal person, and
programs, including Harvard, Columbia & NYU Colleges and Schools when the matter at hand is really not relevant to the shid-
duch and has little to no bearing on how good a life partner
Earn your degree through ONLINE COURSES, or parent the single will be, and as long as what one is say-
accessible anywhere (in 18-33 months, depending on the degree) ing is not objectively a lie, it is best to simply affirm a gener-
ally positive statement.
TheYIEP@gmail.com | 917-209-8204 | www.theYIEP.com
Skillful Reframing
Similarly, if one is asked about a single in a way that might
de facto put the single in a negative light, it is best to reframe
the answer. For example, if one is asked if a young man or
woman is “quiet,” and the response is yes, that is generally
not something people want to hear, even if the single on the
questioner’s end needs a quiet spouse.
However, if one replies by saying, “No, I think dignified or
tzanua would be a better way to describe him/her,” one has
given the same information but now reframed it in a way that
is much less likely to turn off the person one is talking to.
Choosing non-negative descriptors for middos which may
otherwise be viewed negatively is a skill that must be
acquired when it comes to fielding shidduch calls.
Furthermore, in both of the above examples, these are not
objective qualities. The questioner may feel that a B- is con-
46 u www.wherewhatwhen.com u
