When I was young, I had, as most people do, experienced various types of shuls and rabbonim. There were the older, European rabbonim, whom I respected but could not identify with; they did not represent something that I would consider doing. The rabbis I met who were clearly American did not attract me for the exact opposite reason. I did not see their role as teaching Torah. Often, the role of rabbi involved all sorts of halachic compromises that to me were completely unacceptable. And these rabbis appeared to me to be more social workers than rabbonim. I was looking for a rav to be a rav who would be a teacher of adults and a role model for his congregants. Although it would seem that this is the obvious role of a rav, at the time, the American scene of rabbonim and shuls did not have many young rabbonim whom I felt were worthy of the title, nor were the congregations interested in hiring this type of rav.

In this, our annual “organizations” issue, we bring you profiles of some new Baltimore organizations as well as some old stalwarts. All organizations are established to serve a need. Sometimes, fulfilling the need takes a lot of money and a lot of people; sometimes it takes no money and just one or two people. All organizations show thought and caring for those around us. Browse through this article and be inspired.

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Nismach Maryland

“As the organization’s name implies, Nismach is a group that encourages happiness,” says Margie Pensak, who often hosts get-togethers in her home. “It’s patterned after the international group, Samchainu, which supports over 2,700 widows throughout the world. The activities are uplifting and fun with the intention of reminding the participants that, even though their husbands have passed away, they need to continue seeking happiness and enjoy life.”

Nismach Maryland, a program of Yad Yehuda of Greater Washington, was founded in 2015 by Stephanie Savir-Perlman, to afford over 175 Maryland almanos the opportunity to experience some of the same enjoyable and meaningful friendship-building activities as their Samchainu “sisters’” who primarily reside in the New York area. The group serves Orthodox Jewish widows in Baltimore, Silver Spring, and the Metro Washington, D.C. areas.

In the Torah portion of Miketz, Yosef has been taken out of jail and called before Pharaoh to interpret the ruler’s disturbing dreams. In Bereishis (41:33) Yosef advises Pharaoh to select someone to oversee Egypt who is an “ish navon v’chacham.” Although a casual translation would simply indicate the need to choose someone wise to protect the kingdom from famine, Yosef specifically uses two words, navon and chacham. The Rashbam says that in this context the words mean “knowledgeable” and “possessing foresight.” Rambam explains this as, “possessing technical skills” and “people skills.” Even the pagan Pharaoh recognizes that, while being wise is vital to perform the difficult tasks at hand, Yosef also possesses the Divine “spirit of G-d within him.” Yosef is therefore much more than wise. It is for this reason that Pharaoh chooses Yosef to become the viceroy of Egypt.

I’ve been giving a lot of thought to the words navon v’chacham. The Talmud, in Tamid 32, refers to a chacham as someone who can ascertain the consequences of future actions. When we meet those rare individuals, who are both a chacham and a navon, we are surely meeting someone who possesses the Divine spirit.

Those wonderful daughters of mine are going about their business working and living….and shopping. They shop more often than I did at their age. And I must say, they are far savvier than I ever was. They always manage to find the most beautiful, aidel, and fashionable items. They never seem to mind the constant changes in styles that happen around them, like the fact that it’s virtually impossible these days to find a decent pair of shoes.

I’ve spent the last two years unsuccessfully looking for Shabbos shoes. I used to shop at this wonderful place that had rows and rows of lovely shoes. It was a discount store that sold quality, well-made shoes in all sizes. I used to go there at least twice a year and never had difficulty finding something just right. I often felt like the proverbial kid in a candy store happily coming home with my large shopping bag filled with enough goodies to last me for the season. But with each passing year, the styles changed, and I couldn’t wear the shoes they were selling, even if I liked them, which I didn’t.

I wanted to use this space to once again encourage parents to consider the benefits of early intervention for their kids who have started to drink or use other drugs. We already know that substances like nicotine, cannabis, and alcohol are used by too many adolescents in our community. We also know that some of these kids who begin to use drugs will develop a more serious problem that will become a disorder.

It is no small thing to have a substance use disorder, no matter what the drug. It is one of the worst things that can happen to a person (and a family). The diagnostic manual used by most health practitioners (DSM-V) describes 11 criteria for substance use disorder. These criteria include:

·         symptoms that fall into the categories of poor control of use (e.g., using more than intended)

·         risky use (e.g., driving under the influence)

·         impaired social functioning (e.g., neglect of schoolwork or other obligations)

·         physical dependence (e.g., tolerance or withdrawal)

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transcribed by Howard Wasserman

Editor’s Note: Baltimore’s iconic Wasserman and Lemberger butcher shop is still located on Reisterstown Road, owned now by Mr. Arie Benjamin. But old timers will remember when both Mr. Wasserman and Mr. Lemberger, with their white butcher’s coats and gracious European manners, stood behind the counter and served customers. Here is the story of Mr. Bernard Wasserman, told in his own words.

I was born in 1923, in Emeruth, Bavaria, in Germany, which is located approximately 30 kilometers from Nuremberg and five kilometers from the town of Edensdorf, where the train station was. The town was a farming village of approximately a thousand people. It was a real hick town – no paved streets. Jews were allowed to settle there around 1700 or so, as the cemetery’s tombstone’s go back to that date. It had a nice shul, built around 1850 from sandstone, and a thriving Jewish community composed of cattle dealers and tradesmen.

My grandparents on my father’s side were Jacob and Babette Wasserman. My grandfather was a cattle dealer and also, at one time or another, a butcher, who processed small animals, such as goats and calves, when the slaughterhouse was in one of the rooms of a house in Emeruth. They sold the hindquarters to non-Jews and the forequarters to Jews. Jacob was a religious man as people were in those days in the small villages; so was my grandmother. They kept Shabbos, Yontif, kashrus, and never did any business on Shabbos or holidays.

Most readers of the WWW keep Shabbos and have learned from their youth that Shabbos is a special day, when we look forward to eating special foods, inviting guests, and learning the parsha. As parents, we try to make our children look forward to Shabbos, too. But enjoying Shabbos is not always easy, especially these days, when we are connected to electronics the whole week and are used to being distracted. What can families do to make Shabbos special?

Advice from a Rebbetzin

Miriam, a rebbetzin, told me that she sometimes gets phone calls from people whose children are struggling with Judaism. Miriam said, “The first thing I ask them is if they make their Shabbos table fun. Each family is different, and what is fun for one family may not be fun for another one. It takes thought and effort to find out what your family enjoys and to plan that activity. When my children were young, we had a special spot where we all hung out together on Friday nights. It was cozy and warm, and everyone read their own book. For us, that was fun, and my children looked forward to our weekly get-together.

“A teenage boy I know once told his mother that he hates erev Shabbos because it was full of screaming,” Miriam adds. “When the mother heard that she tried to make Friday afternoons more pleasant. Especially when it comes to Yiddishkeit, it is important to make your children’s memories positive. Then they will grow up and do the same for their families.”

The smoke detector sounds. It is an emergency. Without question, we must do something. Studies show that when there is a fire, many people instinctively retrace their steps to exit the building through the same doorway that they came in. 

In marriage, too, when alarms sound and a sense of urgency sets in, there is a tendency for many people to instinctively think that they should retrace their steps. When there are problems, they think that they must undo the marriage and proceed with divorce. We must ask ourselves: Is there another option?

When a person is in a crisis, it is best to take a moment to assess the situation. The smart way out of the crisis is not necessarily to undo our steps. In the case of a smoke detector, it might be safer and more effective to properly assess the situation and use a fire extinguisher if necessary. In the case of a marriage crisis, it might well be safer and more effective to meet with a mentor who specializes in the area of concern and learn relationship skills to bring the marriage to a happy place.  

As the temperature drops, there may be nothing that says “comfort” quite like sipping some hot soup. With every spoonful, you can feel the warmth radiate throughout your body. Whether you are chilled, aching, or just tired, finishing a bowl of soup is like being wrapped in a warm blanket on the inside.

It is fascinating how this simple sustenance can be both an inexpensive meal and a gourmet dish. It is fed to prison inmates and soldiers – and also to presidents and kings. It exudes warmth and comfort to the family yet takes little prep and inexpensive ingredients. Anyone can handle the straightforward cooking process – cut this, boil that – and there are hundreds of varieties to please any palette.

It is possible to question why we “eat” soup instead of “drink” it, since it’s a liquid. The fact that we don’t put it in a mug is also troublesome. Isn’t soup just a hot drink? As an important part of the meal, deserving its own course and requiring separate utensils, soup is far beyond a beverage.

Long ago, soup was eaten as an accompaniment to bread, which was used to soak up the liquid. When people started eating the soup on its own, in the 1600s, they adopted the name we know today, deriving from the Latin verb suppare, which means “to soak.”

This year’s presidential election has brought into focus the ominous polarization between right and left in America. Indeed, political turmoil marks the current political climate around the world. But, beyond the obvious, several political movements are progressing far below the radar. None of them is grabbing headlines, but, if successful, their repercussions would be disastrous.

Interestingly, the words of our talmidei chachamim are often relevant to current events. Consider the Malbim’s commentary on these pesukim:

“A river issues forth from Eden to water the garden, and from there it is divided and becomes four headwaters. The name of the first is Pishon… The gold of that land is good… and the Shoham stone. The name of the second river is Gichon… that encircles the whole land of Cush. The name of the third river is Chiddekel…that flows toward the east of Assyria. The fourth river is the Euphrates” (Bereishis, 2:10-14).