To the Shadchan:
Thank you for your very helpful columns about shidduchim. You are the epitome of sechel. Now that our oldest son is starting in shidduchim, we are flabbergasted at all the new “rules.” It seems like a different world today than when we went out. If you step out of the box, everybody looks at you, saying you are not yeshivishe enough, not this-or-that enough, etc. For example, calling the girl before the first date is now taboo. It doesn’t make sense that the shadchan has to be the one to set it up; we feel if you are old enough and mature enough to get married, you should certainly be able to make a short phone call. We didn’t like it but ended up going along with the crowd.